"Why Me"

I feel bad for writing this because I know that you are not supposed to have a "why me" attitude with the Lord. But sometimes you can't help but ask that question. The first time that I can remember asking that was just a few months ago. My wifes mother had just passed away from cancer. She had been battling it for 2 years and I always had hope that God would heal her like so many others he had. But when the day came and the Lord took her home, my first question was "Why me. Why now". Me and my wife had not even been married 1 year and this happeneds. Then the question turned to "Why does my wife have to go through this." I even started thinking that this was somehow my fault. I thought that maybe I had done something wrong and God was taking it out on my wife and her family. This thought was brought on due to the fact that her mom was diagnosed with the cancer only months after we started to date.

I was getting very mad at myself and at God for letting this happen. Then while I was sitting there with my head in my hands I heard the answer loud and clear. It wasn't anything that I had done. It was going to happen wheither I was there or not. God had brought me in to my wifes life so I could be there for her.

While I am still not sure why God didnt heal my mother-in-law, I know that he has the big picture infront of him. While I do not know why and will never know why things worked out like they did(atleast while on earth) , I know that God is there with me and my wife in everything that we do and has the best intrest in mind for us.

So if you ever catch yourself thinking "Why Me", maybe you should be asking "How can I make this situation glorify the Lord."